Oh boy, what a day. I don’t want to go into things just yet- this might end up becoming an opportunity for us down the road but for now I’m just kind of tired. So, let’s have a nice, goofy, chill update where we just relax with some cat pics, hmm?
Be warned, the story will get a little gross at points, so I wouldn’t read this while you’re eating.
This is D’artagnan, also known as D’arcy, the “bad kitty” who gives Bad Kitty Games it’s name. Many moons ago, her mother, Gizmo, turned up, lost and very pregnant, in my back yard. She was very obviously not a feral cat, so my mom and I started taking care of her, feeding her first tinned tuna and then some dry cat food that our neighbor donated.
We put up signs around the neighborhood, trying to reach her owner, but for two weeks we didn’t hear from anyone. Gizmo eventually gave birth underneath my mom’s back deck. But, unfortunately, the afterbirth got tangled up in Gizmo’s tail fur, and she started to freak out and panic. She crawled out from under the deck, three of her kitten dragging behind her, and hid under a wheelbarrow.
So while we were busy freaking out over the tangled up kittens, my mom realized she could still hear mewling from beneath the deck. I ran to the garage, grabbed a crowbar, and started levering up the planks, until I found a small grey and white kitten that had been abandoned.
We couldn’t get the other kittens free from the tangled, gross mess of Gizmo’s tail, so eventually we decided to bring the whole family to an emergency vet clinic two towns over. They took care of everything- including providing us with some new kitten stuff and giving Gizmo an immune system booster that the kittens would get in their milk. Thankfully, once the tail situation had been resolved, Gizmo took back all her kittens.
Because my brother was deathly allergic to cats- as in, he could go into anaphylactic shock and die- Gizmo and co. had to live out in the back shed. That night, I was so concerned about a raccoon or fox getting into the shed and making off with the kittens, I got hardly any sleep, but fortunately my stress proved unfounded. They lived through the night, and the next afternoon I received a call from Gizmo’s owner.
She asked if I found her cat. I told her she had the numbers wrong, and she had multiple cats. That came as a bit of surprise to her.
Nekochan decided to adopt one of the kittens (we were just dating at the time), and we knew that we had to get the grey kitten I saved from under the deck. When it came to the name, we decided that the three kittens that were stuck to Gizmo were the three musketeers, and so, the fourth one had to be D’Artagnan.
I then didn’t see D’arcy for most of the next year as Nekochan took her home and Nekochan’s dad didn’t like me very much. So I missed most of the cute, tiny kitten stage, and she was mostly fully grown by the time we met again.
As you may have gathered from these images, D’arcy’s hobbies include sitting on and inside a wide variety of objects, including gaming books, cell phones, paint brushes, dirty laundry, clean laundry, remote controls, game controllers, and board games in progress. She is also so fluffy that she is perfectly capable of completely engulfing objects smaller than she is.
She’s pretty smart for a cat. She used to enjoy playing with laser pointers, until one day she looked up at me and went for my hand. Ever since, she couldn’t give less of a shit about laser pointer dots- she knows my tricks.
She also takes a long time to trust new people. She loves Nekochan to bits, but it took her a couple years to accept me and she’s only just started really warming up to the RPG group we’ve been inviting over for the last six years. So yeah, a little bit of a bitch.
She also sheds everywhere, destroys everything we hold dear, and isn’t afraid to express her displeasure by drawing blood. She is not a sweet cuddly cat, and if you try to treat her that way, she will fuck you up.
The furniture she’s destroyed includes: two bed frames, a coffee table, two desks, one kitchen table, multiple door frames, and two easy chairs. She’s also puked on my Legend of the Five Rings 4th edition core book, for which I will never forgive her.
So that’s our mascot. She’s mellowed a little in her old age but is still perfectly capable of wrecking you if you fuck with her. Hope you enjoyed this little trip down memory lane with me!